I hate checking my teen’s bark alerts because I end up seeing conversations with his friends that aren’t necessarily something I need to know. Meaning, he or they are not in true harm but the content is disturbing for me as the parent. There is a lot of sexual exploration being done on their own (phew! Thanks, COVID!) and talked about with friends, identities and stuff being considered. The kid I see in these messages is not the kid I see in person and reading these is totally affecting my mood and how I view my kid. Is anyone else experiencing this? How do you manage it? I have tried to get my husband to take over some of the monitoring, but he often doesn’t. And, he doesn’t have my detective nature so I am afraid he will miss the concerning bits.
I have the sensitivities set low because often some concerning situation is actually couched in a more simple conversation but that means I get to see all the yucky stuff too.
How do I keep a filter in mind when I am reading the alerts–like a filter for “this is probably normal teen private friend conversation” (even if I don’t like it) vs. “this is the concerning stuff”?